


Memories of Song

by hinotoriii



Category: Fallout - Fandom, Fallout 4
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-30
Updated: 2016-01-30
Packaged: 2018-05-17 06:47:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,153
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5858551
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hinotoriii/pseuds/hinotoriii
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>"You’d be surprised by what shows up every now and again around here, doll. There’s always the chance for an old song to play when you least expect it to."</i>
</p><p> </p><p>When an old, familiar tune plays unexpectedly over the radio, Ana and Nick reflect over the lives they've left behind themselves.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Memories of Song

**Author's Note:**

> This ended out differently than I expected it would, but as my first go at writing for Fallout, I consider it a chance to get used to new characters. 
> 
> The two songs used in this are _The Way You Look Tonight_ and _Blue Skies_.

She doesn't even realise she's doing it, not at first. It just happens naturally, a force of habit from the days before the world she came from had ended and which still hadn’t truly left her.  
  
As she sits within Nick's small office -- or the one she now shares with Nick, if his earlier words about having her become a permanent partner to the agency were as true as he had intended them to sound -- Ana focuses her attention on sewing what had once been a rather new, rather large new tear in the fabric of her Silver Shroud coat. It's yet another addition to the numerous cuts and bullet holes the outfit has seen over the past few months since she’s become its new owner, and really Ana thinks she might have to drop in at Goodneighbor sometime soon to see if Rick has any new ideas to modify it with.  
  
Whilst sewing she listens to the radio Nick had turned on before he had left her to search through some of his files, and Ana hums mindlessly along to the tunes which she hears. Some of the songs are different than what have usually been played, and it makes her wonder if perhaps Travis had found a stash of old records hidden away recently. It's nice though, hearing the familiar sound of songs she had either forgotten or figured she'd simply never hear again. Especially when it came to some of the more memorable ones, like the one which plays currently throughout the room.  
  
Ana is calm and content as she hums and continues sewing, so much so she doesn't even hear Nick when he reenters the room. It's not until she hears the familiar sound of his voice that she realises she's no longer alone.  
  
"Sinatra hey? Can't say I've heard the sound of his voice for a long while now. Were you fan of Ol’ Blue Eyes?"

With a small smile Ana lifts her head, turning to where Nick stands. He’s holding a packet of cigarettes, pulling one out and holding it between his lips.

“I guess so,” She says, taking a moment to think back on the songs she used to listen to. “I liked a lot of his songs. Some more than others. I never really thought that I’d ever hear them again, just assumed they were another thing which had unfortunately been lost. Until now.”

Ana turns to look back at the small radio sitting on Nick’s desk, her smile becoming fond and thoughtful. She can smell the cigarette Nick holds as he begins to smoke, and both the mixture of the scent and the song strike a strong sense of familiarity within her. The memories of so many evenings spent in smoky, large halls come to the forefront of her mind; of times surrounded by good company and music drifting itself throughout the atmosphere around them all. Her heart aches slightly at the feeling of nostalgia which lurches within her chest, and for a moment Ana wonders if she had perhaps lived a past life where such events had been a thing of normality for her.

From a certain point of view, she has.

“You’d be surprised by what shows up every now and again around here, doll,” Replies Nick, moving to sit on a chair. He lifts the cigarette up to his lips again and takes another drag from it, the smoke leaving both his synthetic lips and the exposed spaces along and upon his neck. “There’s always the chance for an old song to play when you least expect it to. Why, you should’ve seen how shocked I was the day I heard Nat King Cole again. I was probably just as surprised as you are right now. Although …” Nick pauses, lowering the cigarette again as he watches Ana for a brief moment, bright yellow eyes searching her. “This one seems to have made you especially happy. A special song for you, perhaps?”

“A little,” Answers Ana, her voice far away as she listens to the words of the next verse.

_Lovely. Never, never change. Keep that breathless charm…_

She closes her eyes for a second, the corners of her lips twitching upwards a little. So many times she’d heard Nate sing along to them for her, the sound of his ever beautifully deep voice low as he spoke into her ear. They were often in a room filled amongst other couples, but Ana was always able to escape into a world that was just the two of them whenever he sang to her. Nothing else ever really seemed to matter on those occasions.

“My husband and I used to dance together a lot. Whenever he'd return from duty there would be an event for the soldiers, sort of like a welcome home get together where family was allowed. If it wasn't those we were going to then it was one of the dance places within the town, places which were always filled with other couples wanting to enjoy themselves for an evening." Ana tilts her head, her memories lost in the past. "This was our favourite song. Nate even brought me a record of it for my thirtieth birthday."

The record was nothing but dust by now, disintegrated by both radiation and the passing of time. Ana had played it a lot -- especially throughout her pregnancy with Shaun, as the familiar tune always managed to soothe her during the rough days she had -- and as she is once again hit by the reality that she'll never return to that simple, family life again, Ana can't help but to grow somewhat sad.

She almost jumps when she catches sight of Nick's human-like hand offered out in front of her. Puzzled, Ana turns to him once more, noticing how he's stubbed the cigarette out and thrown it away whilst she had been caught up in her own daze. Nick must read her confusion easily, as he's quick to speak.

"Come on doll, a dance for old times sake. I know I'm not your husband, but you don't wanna go tainting the good memories shared with him by hating everytime the song plays. And if I know Travis, he'll be playin' it for weeks yet."

Ana looks down towards Nick's hand again, before eventually reaching for it with her own. A small hint of a smirk rises onto her lips, and her eyes shift upwards to meet his gaze.

"Colour me surprised. I didn't know you danced."

"You wouldn't. It's not somethin' I go around telling everyone. Besides, whoever said the world has to end just 'cause the detective dances?"

Ana's smirk grows a little more amused. She starts to stand, letting Nick begin to guide her to where there's a little bit of space for them both to move around within the small office.

"You _have_ stepped outside in the last two hundred years, yes? I think we're a little late to worry about the end of the world now, Nick."

It feels oddly strange, dancing with Nick. His synthetic hand is abnormally cold from where it clasps Ana's contrastly warmer one, and the skeletal frame of his more robotic one rests gently just above her waist. It wasn't like when Nate would hold her close to his body as he danced with her, yet still there remains comfort within Nick's presence. Ana sways along with him, their dancing so slow and simple with the rhythm of the song playing as well as the limited space they have. She wonders briefly if maybe, were she to close her eyes, she could forget that she is a woman stranded in time.

"So tell me," She says. "The human Nick and his girl, Jennifer. Did they have a special song of their own too?"

Ana worries for a second if perhaps she shouldn't have asked, if the memory as well as the pain along with it are still fresh within Nick’s mind, despite it being literally a lifetime ago for him. Yet as so often is his way Nick surprises her, instead replying easily.

"Yeah, they did. At least I remember them playin' one often whenever they were together. I think it went something like _'blue skies, smilin' at me...'_ "

With her face hidden from his view Ana lets her lips curl upwards into a soft smile.

"I remember that song," She says. Before Nick can respond, she continues, singing the words that appear within her mind. "' _Nothing but blue skies, from now on._ '"

"Huh," Nick answers, and Ana can hear the amusement which is hidden in his tone. She half expects that if she were looking at him she’d find he is smiling too. "I gotta admit, it's kinda nice that someone else around here knows of it. And here I almost worried the damned song had gone and been lost like all the other pre-war treasures no one has ever been able to salvage or save."

"Well, you're not the only relic in Diamond City anymore, Nick. Not now you’re friends with the Vault popsicle stick that's alive and up walking around."

Despite her attempt at humour the truth manages to stab at her heart with all the power of a blunt knife. It still hurts if she thinks about it for too long, knowing she's the only survivor out of all those others which had managed to get into Vault 111 back when the bombs had first hit. Ana had originally hoped to wake with the chance of creating a new life with both Nate and Shaun, and every so often she is reminded of how that dream of hers is all but dust now. Even though she is finally managing to adjust well enough to the new Commonwealth which surrounds her each time she wakes, Ana supposes her heartbreak will never truly leave her. Just as Nick's heartbreak over the memories held from his past tarnished dreams with Jennifer will never really leave him, either.

The song has long since finished, and Travis has moved onto another, more regularly played one from over the airwaves. But still Ana sways with Nick, lost in her own memories as they dance. Nick must pick up on the melancholy which has befallen her, as his arm shifts in a light in a way which prompts Ana to break from her brief daze.

"There's nothin' wrong with being relics now, is there? If anything, it means we have some of the best stories to share with people. You gotta admit, nothin' quite beats the look of confusion when you're trying to explain to someone what a moving picture is. Or should I say, _was._ Shame we've lost the movies too, but at least we have the memories of 'em. That's more than what others will ever have."

Ana reflects back to the dances she’s shared with Nate, of holding a young Shaun in her arms as she rocks him to sleep, humming the melody to Frank Sinatra's memorising voice. They are parts of her past she will never forget, and Ana understands that the point Nick makes is a perfect one.

Her treasured memories will be with her until the day she eventually dies. She won't forget them, betray them or try to dismiss them in any way. They are a part of her, a reminder of what had once be, of who she had once been, as well as a way for her to hold on to the loves she has since tragically lost one way or another. The thoughts may sometimes bring her pain or sadness, and Ana may find times where she yearns for the simpler gone by days, but she is thankful she has them all the same. For the alternative is unthinkable.

Never would she wish to let them go, nor fade away from existence completely.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
Later, when Ana is shrugging her repaired coat over her shoulders and preparing to leave the agency’s crowded comfort to meet with Piper, she hears Nick humming a tune as he searches through his case files. She knows what it is he hums quickly, and Ana can’t help but to turn to where Ellie sits behind the desk reading a paper to exchange a smile with her.

Ellie probably doesn’t know the origin of the song, but she knows enough to understand it’s struck a chord with him. Ana however can’t help but wonder if perhaps Nick has decided to hold onto the good memories from his human self's life too, just as she’s doing with her past.

She turns, moving to open the front door. Ana places her hat upon her head before stepping out into the dark and pouring rain, and as she does she can just about still hear Nick’s mindless humming before the door closes shut behind her.

_‘Never saw the sun shining so bright. Never saw things going so right…’_


End file.
